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[05 Mar 2006|10:55pm] |
Every attempt to…
Is filled with holes.
Reads like a polygraph I’m told.
I’m not bitter anyway.
Let it go.
I never sleep still
Lest I forget.
Tied down by handicaps instead.
I’m not bitter anyway,
But I didn’t want it to turn out this way.
Sing a long goodnight,
Forfeit any fight.
Refuse to rest assured.
It comes with no reply.
Hold on too tight.
I hang on every word.
If it all ended tonight,
You know that I wouldn’t mind.
Back to the good old times
Before it won.
If it all ended tonight,
You know that I wouldn’t mind.
Back to the good old times
Before it won.
Sing a long goodnight,
Forfeit any fight.
Refuse to rest assured.
It comes with no reply.
Hold on too tight.
I hang on every word.
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[21 Feb 2006|08:12pm] |
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It's never fucking good enough is it?
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[20 Feb 2006|05:01am] |
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I'm so fucking confused
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[06 Feb 2006|09:26pm] |
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It seems worth the wait to see you smile again.. :]
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[20 Jan 2006|06:36am] |
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I got a new layout for my lj so look at it a lot or something
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| every night I'm watching you |
[19 Jan 2006|04:25pm] |
anybody know what I should do this weekend
I need some ideas?
With a black heart undercover, watching you sleep every night.
"I wish you'd watch me too..." We're made for each other!
Honey if you only knew, Every night I'm watching you...
Shut up you're talking to loud for me to not listen.
This operation's gotten old, the face I stole, the gun of
Lost shot through your soul, and all that's left is empty holes.
Mom and Dad can't help you anymore! Get in the car we'll drive far to the end of the shore,
Under the docks, on top of the rocks. KNOCK! KNOCK! KNOCK! KNOCK!
Why the fuck are the doors locked!?
Maybe she forgot about our talks, or maybe I'm mistaken,
But I swear to god that she's not getting out of this without some kind of explanation,
Oh I'm straining on your patience!? Maybe scaring you a little!?
Just because I came to visit doesn't mean you have to hide.
I'll be waiting on the side of your house,
With an empty bodybag
AND A LOADED .45!!!!
AND NOW YOU WON'T FORGET
MY FUCKING NAME!!!!!!!
You're tearing me up, inside my mind.
You walked in front, I ran behind...
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[15 Jan 2006|01:57pm] |
my dad found my vodka in my car
but I'm not grounded?
hell yeah lol
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[15 Jan 2006|11:58am] |
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the last two nights were pretty fun
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[12 Jan 2006|05:15pm] |
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i didn't get my phone, but I ordered it online and it should be here within 1-2 business days, then I have to get it activated..
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[11 Jan 2006|10:12pm] |
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[11 Jan 2006|09:12pm] |
I just tried to type livejournal.com and I typed livejouranal.com Hahahaha
I'm the most tired I've ever been during the week..boo
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| How can I check lost and found when I'm too busy getting down? |
[11 Jan 2006|02:45pm] |
whoa. so I don't know about some things.
but I'm getting a haircut. that's for sure.
I hope it turns out good.
it's going to be semi short.
it would be cool if what if.. started up again.
cause I want to play my synth and get down.
uhm
me and abby are ok I guess, well not really but I shouldn't say anything.
We'll see how things go, we had a fight.
and I went to school with no one to talk to cause dustin and abby didn't come.
so that sucks.
I think I'm upgrading my cell phone yay I guess
my old one is from 1985 so it needs one.
k
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[28 Aug 2005|05:15pm] |
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I GOT THE NEW TATU CD
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| I amaze myself sometimes |
[16 Aug 2005|03:38am] |
maydayimdead: If you and Kandas were one, I could call you Aluminum Kan
maydayimdead: I'm a genius, so what can you do, you know, we are just born that way
piano fagbar: WTF?!
maydayimdead: no? Ah, well you learn somebody
maydayimdead: someday
piano fagbar: somebody!
piano fagbar: HAHAHAH
maydayimdead: compound sentences
maydayimdead: school+bus=schoolbus
maydayimdead: lunch+box=lunchbox
maydayimdead: see
maydayimdead: it makes sense Al
maydayimdead: This is all really good info material
maydayimdead: I'm on this outstanding roll
maydayimdead: of like honor tape
maydayimdead: hah
maydayimdead: get it
maydayimdead: roll of tape
maydayimdead: Damn, I slay myself sometimes
piano fagbar: I dot get it.
maydayimdead: Well, with your 'brain' you wouldn't 'dot' it
maydayimdead: I just
maydayimdead: feel like crying right now, I thought I was dumb all this time, but I finally see...
maydayimdead: I see that I'm better than you!
maydayimdead: Goddamnit, I'm writing a book, I can't just go on petty AIM info's, what am I? A fucking joke..? I think not
maydayimdead: You made me a AIM celebrity, who the fuck wants instant stardom!? You can't just do that Allyson, you have to plan for this kinda shit
maydayimdead: I'm feeling sophisticated making you feel lower than me, I need my pipe
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[25 Jul 2005|06:46pm] |
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go into wordpad or word or something and type Q33 NY (the flight # of the first plane to hit the world trade center) then change it to size 48 and to the font style wingdings
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| REGGIE |
[25 Jul 2005|02:56am] |
| [ |
mood |
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 REGGIE |
] |
| [ |
music |
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REGGIE |
] |
( this is it )
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[21 Jul 2005|07:37pm] |
this is fucking stupid
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[19 Jul 2005|07:15am] |
Anybody up for starting a band with me
cause the last one died or something
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[13 Jul 2005|02:38am] |
She didn't mean to deceive you, believe me
But sometimes the hardest part is conceiving
The good intentions that you had
Now only came to this
And although she saw the mark
The arrow missed
It isn't exciting reciting the stories
Of kind words turned hurting when routine gets boring
Both getting tired of punk rock clubs
And both playing in punk rock bands
The start was something good
But some good things must end
And she said, "It could never survive
With such differing lives
One home, one out on tour again
We may never come back
The strike of a match
The candle's burning at both ends."
And now she knows too much
And I'm too fucked up
It's awkward trying to make my move
I'll pretend that I'm fine
Show up right on time
But I know I'll never be that cool
I never wanted to hold you back
I just wanted to hold on
But my chance is gone
I know / just where / I stand / a boy
Trapped in the body of a man and
I'll take what you're willing to give
And I'll teach myself to live
With a walk-on part of a background shot
From a movie I'm not in
She's so important
And I'm so retarded
And now I realize
I should have kissed you in L.A.
But I drove home all alone
As if I had a choice, anyway
Where are you coming from?
What are you running from?
Is it so hard to see?
And if you're feeling scared
Remember the time we shared
You know it meant everything (everything)
You know that it meant everything to me
You know that it meant everything to me
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[08 Jul 2005|04:07am] |
| [ |
mood |
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 indescribable |
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| [ |
music |
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Head Automatica |
] |
I guess I could update now. You know, for real. I guess I can start bitching about people falling in love or whatever and ignoring their friends, but I'm not. Or I could start talking behind peoples back, but I'm not. I could also whine about some kids that hate my friends and about our on going feud, but I'm not.
I guess I'll I can say is that nowadays my life feels like a roller coaster. All these emotions coming and going so fast that I don't know how to act anymore. I feel like I'm acting the same but I know I'm not. I never used to act like this, but I can't help it now. I should control it but I don't do this to myself. People do. Maybe it's teen angst. Should I start listening to Kurt Cobain or something, is this a sign? I don't know, but it should stop soon. I like the old me, my emotions meaning nothing to me, never being affected by anything.
Maybe this isn't what I should feel about this whole change. Maybe I should like it, I should like this new me, or just accept it because I can't do anything now.
I kind of want to know, why be lonely? What are they good traits to be single? Hopefully my friends feel more than just infatuation.
I have a reason why I started drinking though. I shouldn't really say that on here because obviously this isn't a real journal. But I do.
I might get me a good past time for me too. Maybe reading or something productive like a collection. But maybe just a teenage hobbie, like video games or like start a gang. Hmm. I think it just might be video games, cause I'm good at them and I like playing them. Kinda makes sense. I'd like to write a book. That would be nice. I miss my gameboy.
I think I should get a job, but I'm still iffy about it. I'd like to work in Bethel cause it's not out of my reach but there's nothing interesting to work at.
I've kinda decided about my future. But just a minor part. I kind of want to live in a city. Not this small village bullshit. I always like going down to Newport and hanging out, watching the people there. They seem to like living there. All the pretty lights, gorgeous river at night, the big city across the river, it's just nice, the downside is the racism violence. I dont' think I could get away from that.
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[07 Jul 2005|05:44pm] |
Hell yes
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[07 Jul 2005|03:29am] |
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[15 Jun 2005|01:12am] |
( Damn )
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stab_backward's journal